Part 3 - Saturday.
The plan was to meet up in my room at 11am. Sharp. Probably the biggest surprise of the whole weekend? The fact that all the guys in the wedding showed up on time. Believe me. I was as surprised as you were.
Next was getting ready in my room, and proceeding to the church at 12:30 for pictures. Much like the night before, it was hot. Not a neat kinda hot, like "glistening supermodel" hot. "Sweaty fat-guy-balls" hot. Not good.
It's funny how hours of pictures actually don't even feel like that on such a big day. I was dreading it, but it was far from painful.
Yes, I cried during the ceremony. Yes, I cried when I wished my mom could've been there to see it. Yes, I'm starting to cry now as I write this. But it's a good cry.
After the wedding, we boarded a trolley to take us to the reception. We loaded the Walmart styrofoam coolers (yee-haw!) with booze and made our way. Of course, it was only, like, 6 blocks to the reception...lots of work for little return...
As is customary with wedding receptions, the wedding party waited until the rest of the guests arrived before making our grand entrance. But there was a catch. As we waited in the lobby of the adjacent hotel...and drank...we got scolded by the front desk because we were drinking booze that we didn't buy there. Asses.
We proceeded up to my room, as it was the...uh...nearest to us, I guess. Styrofoam coolers and all. We drank for about another 45 minues, and then left the coolers there while we made our way to the party.
The reception, for me, was quite a blur. Not because I was hammered. Well...not JUST because I was hammered. Mostly because I saw pretty much every person I'd ever grown up with and around. It was crazy. Every time I turned around, it was a person I knew. Nuts, I tell you. But awesome.
The part I remember the most was...well...I won't bore you with the details. It was basically a tribute to my mom, with 300 people crammed onto a dancefloor the size of my bedroom, everyone crying and laughing. It was the most surreal moment of my life. I start to shake just thinking about it.
At the risk of this getting too long, I'll paraphrase the next few events:
- Pizzle hits on young in-law cousins
- young in-law cousins are COMPLETELY infatuated with Pizzle.
- Pizzle and Dennis take said cousins out after the reception to a club, and proceed to rip the place to shreds.
- Dennis gets into a drunken dance-off with about 40 black guys.
- Dennis wins.
- Pizzle and Dennis get into a water fight at Denny's.
When we got back to the hotel, we stumbled back up to our room(s). As I got to my room, I fumbled with my key, thinking only about how soft my bed was about to feel.
*squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak* goes the door.
Finally home.
*squish*
"What *squish* the *squish* fuck?"
"Why is my carpet wet? Like...all of it?"
Remember those styrofoam coolers? Yeah...they didn't hold.
Number of sytrofoam coolers: 3
Number of bags of ice filling them: 6
Number of ice cubes that WEREN'T melted, and still in the coolers: zero
"I'm *squish* so dealing *squish* with this *squish* in the *squish* morning," I said in a drunken-4am-stupor.
And that's exactly what I did.
Luckily, there wasn't much to worry about...nothing that I owned personally was affected by the water. All it really had to do was dry. Since it's been a couple weeks and I haven't heard from the hotel, I assume there wasn't much damage done. Whew!
It was a unique end to a suitably unique weekend. Perhaps the best weekend I've ever had. There are definitely people I wish could've been there and shared the event(s) with us. But I think everything happens for a reason, in spite of our ability to affect change on our own. They were there in spirit, and through our memories.
And it will be something I never forget.
Fin.
The plan was to meet up in my room at 11am. Sharp. Probably the biggest surprise of the whole weekend? The fact that all the guys in the wedding showed up on time. Believe me. I was as surprised as you were.
Next was getting ready in my room, and proceeding to the church at 12:30 for pictures. Much like the night before, it was hot. Not a neat kinda hot, like "glistening supermodel" hot. "Sweaty fat-guy-balls" hot. Not good.
It's funny how hours of pictures actually don't even feel like that on such a big day. I was dreading it, but it was far from painful.
Yes, I cried during the ceremony. Yes, I cried when I wished my mom could've been there to see it. Yes, I'm starting to cry now as I write this. But it's a good cry.
After the wedding, we boarded a trolley to take us to the reception. We loaded the Walmart styrofoam coolers (yee-haw!) with booze and made our way. Of course, it was only, like, 6 blocks to the reception...lots of work for little return...
As is customary with wedding receptions, the wedding party waited until the rest of the guests arrived before making our grand entrance. But there was a catch. As we waited in the lobby of the adjacent hotel...and drank...we got scolded by the front desk because we were drinking booze that we didn't buy there. Asses.
We proceeded up to my room, as it was the...uh...nearest to us, I guess. Styrofoam coolers and all. We drank for about another 45 minues, and then left the coolers there while we made our way to the party.
The reception, for me, was quite a blur. Not because I was hammered. Well...not JUST because I was hammered. Mostly because I saw pretty much every person I'd ever grown up with and around. It was crazy. Every time I turned around, it was a person I knew. Nuts, I tell you. But awesome.
The part I remember the most was...well...I won't bore you with the details. It was basically a tribute to my mom, with 300 people crammed onto a dancefloor the size of my bedroom, everyone crying and laughing. It was the most surreal moment of my life. I start to shake just thinking about it.
At the risk of this getting too long, I'll paraphrase the next few events:
- Pizzle hits on young in-law cousins
- young in-law cousins are COMPLETELY infatuated with Pizzle.
- Pizzle and Dennis take said cousins out after the reception to a club, and proceed to rip the place to shreds.
- Dennis gets into a drunken dance-off with about 40 black guys.
- Dennis wins.
- Pizzle and Dennis get into a water fight at Denny's.
When we got back to the hotel, we stumbled back up to our room(s). As I got to my room, I fumbled with my key, thinking only about how soft my bed was about to feel.
*squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak* goes the door.
Finally home.
*squish*
"What *squish* the *squish* fuck?"
"Why is my carpet wet? Like...all of it?"
Remember those styrofoam coolers? Yeah...they didn't hold.
Number of sytrofoam coolers: 3
Number of bags of ice filling them: 6
Number of ice cubes that WEREN'T melted, and still in the coolers: zero
"I'm *squish* so dealing *squish* with this *squish* in the *squish* morning," I said in a drunken-4am-stupor.
And that's exactly what I did.
Luckily, there wasn't much to worry about...nothing that I owned personally was affected by the water. All it really had to do was dry. Since it's been a couple weeks and I haven't heard from the hotel, I assume there wasn't much damage done. Whew!
It was a unique end to a suitably unique weekend. Perhaps the best weekend I've ever had. There are definitely people I wish could've been there and shared the event(s) with us. But I think everything happens for a reason, in spite of our ability to affect change on our own. They were there in spirit, and through our memories.
And it will be something I never forget.
Fin.
11 Comments:
I'm jealous of you. Your life sounds like more fun than mine. Waaaah!
And are you sure you're not from the south? I mean, hitting on your hottie cousins and all...
Hopefully they were at least three times removed. Then it's okay, right?
Shit.
Hope I get to see some photos when we all get together!! :)
Ethel: You must read closely, grasshopper..."in-law" cousins. They're my brother-in-law's cousins...not mine...fair game! ;)
MF: I may not be coming back for the 22nd...details in my next post...
Correction: You are most likely not coming back for the reunion. In fact, I'd wager 10-1 that you won't.
Where's the tawdry hookup stories? Those (in-law) cousins of yours totally wanted your penis.
CONGRATS, Pizzle!!!! Shanshu told me about the new gig.
Awww... you had me laughing and crying all at the same time. I love this series. You are a genius.
YOU ARE A FUCKING LIAR!! Where the hell are you, man? We miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please come back! I can't listen to your radio station because you are too far away!!!
i love the wedding recap series! glad you had a great weekend... even though it was 2 months ago and i'm just now reading this.
hope you're surviving in hotlanta.
Excellent, love it! » »
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